Judging A Person Does Not Define Who They Are … It Defines You

Judging others is the sport of fashion. Now, in a way, it’s something we all do almost unconsciously. We make judgments about everything that surrounds us, because that way we maintain a certain control over each aspect under a label. “This is good, this is bad, I can trust this person, I walk away from this one better …”

It is very common to fall into stereotypes and those heuristics built ahead of time. Before delving a little more into what we have in front of us to make the effort to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes. It is clear that not everyone acts in this way.

H ay who avoids making judgments that in turn, do not want to be judged by others. This is what we should always put into practice, in order to build a more harmonious and tolerant society. We invite you to reflect on it in our space.

Judge, a double-edged sword we shouldn’t fall for

Just for today, don’t judge. It would certainly be very appropriate for all of us to try to practice this simple tip every day. In this way, our relationships would be more respectful and we would create less conflict.

Now, the essential problem is that the social brain is often governed by the need to obtain very fast information about things and people. It classifies all the information and stimuli into categories, and these are related, in turn, to our personality and previous experiences.

• Let’s take an example. When you went to school there was a teacher who treated you badly and who made your school years a “hell”. To this day you still remember her expression, her face and her voice, so that when you meet another woman who looks like her, you project a high rejection on her.

• Many of our previous experiences and even aspects of our personality are going to make us label all those around us according to our own schemes that do not always adjust to reality.

Therefore, the act of “not judging” requires, above all, an effort of calm. It forces us to control that “automatic button.” The one who has the brain when it comes to categorizing everything he sees into heuristics.

Be wise: if you judge, you are also judging yourself

If you avoid interacting with your neighbors because they are of another race or belong to another culture, in reality, each judgment you make will be defining you. They will define a racist and closed-minded person. The man who judges a woman only by the size of her skirt is also judging himself, his machismo.

• Every time we pass judgment on someone, it would be appropriate for us to put into practice a reflection exercise. Why do I think this? Why do I say, for example, that I am going to like this boy just because he has ripped pants and a tattoo?
• Be wise, act calm, measured and balanced and try to see things in a neutral way until you do not experience them in your own skin, until you are aware of every detail and every aspect to judge more correctly. Never before.

Do not base yourself on trivia when judging, base yourself on realities

It is important to clarify here that we all have the full right to maintain and defend our own judgments about everything that involves us. Now, judgments must be based on realities, never on trivialities.

• When you get to know a person in depth, you will already have that wisdom that only experience gives us to decide if we like them or not, if they fit our expectations or not.
• Those who like to rely only on trivia when judging will be missing out on wonderful things in life.
• If you judge your co-worker as unfriendly just by his looks. You may be missing the opportunity to meet someone exceptional.

• Who judges a country or a certain city as dirty, dangerous or not very modern. You may be missing the best experience of your life by refusing to see the place.

The best things, the best people, sometimes, are disguised with armor so common that they mislead us. Only those who come without judgment and with an open heart  will be worthy of knowing truly exciting aspects of what surrounds us.